


Christmas Isn't About Pretending

by graceolina37



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Angst, Christmas, Getting Together, Idiots in Love, M/M, but it has a happy ending, its also very cheesy, this is kind of a mess but its still cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:16:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28284588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/graceolina37/pseuds/graceolina37
Summary: "Reggie never had a reason to believe in the spirit and love that was supposedly behind the holiday, that was, until Luke Patterson walked into his life and taught him that Christmas, among other things, isn't just about pretending. So Reggie had to make sure that it would be perfect for him this year, or at least as perfect as it could be, because of everything Luke had done for him in the past."orLuke is having a heard time dealing with their first Christmas as ghosts, and after remembering the holidays of the past, Reggie helps him get through it (oh, and then they kiss).
Relationships: Luke Patterson/Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 85





	Christmas Isn't About Pretending

As soon as Reggie got his bearings after poofing outside the garage he could hear the soft music coming from inside it. It was mid-December day and Reggie had just gotten back from the beach; Julie was at school, Willie was with Alex and he thought Luke was going to go see his parents so he had wandered by himself for a while before coming back to see if Ray was home yet. But from where he stood outside he could hear the tell-tale strumming of Luke's guitar as he played what Reggie was eventually able to make out as a familiar Christmas song.

Reggie stood outside the garage to listen for a moment, now wanting to interrupt Luke until he was finished. Sure enough, he was playing the song “I'll be Home for Christmas”. Reggie smiled fondly as Luke played the last few notes before opening the door to the garage.

Luke didn't look at all startled from his place on the couch when Reggie walked in; he was still messing with his guitar, and he barely even looked up from it as his friend entered the room. Reggie was about to greet him and then launch straight into a conversation and tell Luke about all the different dogs he saw at the beach when he noticed him trying to inconspicuously wipe his eyes from what Reggie could only assume were tears.

“Luke?” he asked, and when he still wouldn't look at him: “Hey, are you okay man?”

Luke finally looked up at him and Reggie could see that his eyes were red from crying. Seeing Luke upset was like a hammer coming down on his chest, and his cheery mood was replaced by concern for his friend. Reggie moved to sit down next to Luke, putting a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.

“What's wrong?” Reggie tried again when Luke still didn't speak. The guitarist looked at him with sad eyes that could probably make Reggie cry too if he wasn't so focused on finding out what was going on.

“It's nothing,” Luke said, trying to brush it off even though he was still sniffling. But Reggie gave him a warning look that said it wasn't a good enough explanation. It's true that he wasn't the best with social cues or understanding some things, but when it came to his friends he knew when they were upset and he knew when there was something they were keeping from him. Luke turned away from him for a moment but met his eyes again when he continued to speak.

“I guess it's just Christmas, ya know?” He said, the tears starting to collect in his eyes again, “Like, what's it going to be like now that we're…” 

Luke trailed off but Reggie knew what he meant. Christmas had always been one of Luke's favorite times of the year, so it made sense that it was hard for him right now. Reggie didn't know what to say to make it better, so he had to be honest:

“I don't know,” he said as he moved his hand to rub Luke's back. 

“Exactly,” Luke said with a sad smile on his face, “I'm just a little emotional today I guess.”

“It's okay,” Reggie told him, “That's you're sad, I mean. I get it.”

“No matter what though,” Reggie continued, “We always have each other.”

Luke smiled wider at that as he wiped the last of his tears away. Reggie finally pulled him into a proper hug and they stayed there for a long moment, just holding each other. Reggie hadn't thought much about what Christmas would mean for them yet, but now that he knew Luke was thinking about it the gears were starting to turn in his head. He had to figure out a way to make sure Luke had a good holiday; he wouldn't be able to bear it if he didn't get to see his friend happy on Christmas. As he sat there in his friend's embrace, Reggie thought back to the Christmases he had spent with Luke in the past, how they had helped each other and how much it had always meant to his friend. 

Christmas had always been a good day for Reggie. When he woke up in the morning and went downstairs there were always a ton of presents under the brightly lit tree, and his parents tried their best to get along and have a nice family holiday. And even if the mountain of toys and gadgets was just to make up for all the fights and the times they forgot about him the rest of the year, it was still something that showed him they cared. Usually, it was just the three of them until they went to see family for the rest of the day, so they didn't have much to fight about since they were distracted by other things. And even though Reggie got bored easily at his grandparent's house and his Aunt's cooking always left something to be desired, he always tried to have a positive attitude about Christmas, because it was one of the only days a year he could count on to be mostly okay. He knew that after he finished unwrapping his presents and they went home after dinner that the arguments and the yelling and the relieving yet unsettling silent treatments would start again, so he had to appreciate the time when everything seemed normal.

That's what the best part was: the normalcy. At Christmastime, they seemed like they were just a regular, happy family. There was very little actual happiness; no hugging or warm fuzzy feelings. But they were civil and polite, and Reggie was content to even act they were happy compared to what the alternative was. He had seen a lot of Christmas movies, but he never really got the part about “the true meaning of Christmas” beyond presents and pretending to like each other. 

Reggie liked Christmas well enough, but for Luke it was something more. Reggie had known it was just from the way he talked about it. Throughout their friendship, ever since they had met in sixth grade, Luke had always got a certain way around the holidays, like he was always ecstatic about something. He and his family would volunteer at the soup kitchen and donate to the toy drive, and he would tell Reggie and Alex all about it at school like it was the most exciting thing ever. He would take Reggie along to the mall with him to pick out a present for his mom with a $20 bill his dad had given him. He would constantly talk about Christmas plans, and bring his mom's cookies to band practice.

Reggie loved Luke even more at Christmas if it was even possible. He was such a genuine person, and the holiday season brought it out even more. The way he cared so deeply stirred something in Reggie's chest, and he thought the way he was so bubbly that time of year was especially cute in a maybe-more-than-friends way that he didn't start to really think about for a long time. 

So Reggie knew that for Luke, Christmas was about more than just presents, and making it through like it was a normal day. For him, it was about family and love, the two things he cherished most, after his music of course. And that was what made it important to him in a way that it wasn't for Reggie, not entirely at least. And even though Christmas was still good for Reggie, as he got older it got tougher each year. He wasn't a kid anymore, so his parents didn't feel the need to stop the fighting for his sake. They thought that he could handle it, even if it was Christmas. The yelling was so bad that sometimes he had to leave the house; get out and get away from all the noise. Sometimes he would walk down the beach, and return home only in the middle of the night when he knew that his parents were definitely asleep. But after he confided in Luke about what was going on, it wasn't unusual that he showed up to the Patterson house late in the evening, climbed through his friend's first story bedroom window, and spent the night next to the one person who always made him feel the safest. When they got to the studio, he knew that he could probably start going there instead, but when he mentioned it to Luke the other boy said that he should keep coming to his house; that he shouldn't be alone. 

The Christmas of Reggie's sophomore year was when everything finally broke. His parents had one of their more explosive fights on Christmas Eve, and he realized they could no longer just pretend to be a normal, happy family, not even for one day a year. It was all too much, so he just left. And even though he knew what Christmas meant to Luke and his family, he had headed toward the direction of the Patterson house anyway. He especially didn't want to be alone on Christmas, even if it was selfish. So he showed up at Luke's window that night, and even though his light was already off he knocked gently. A lamp flickered on, and Luke came to the window. Reggie could still remember the night in detail:

_“Reggie? What-” Luke opened the window, hair disheveled and voice raspy with sleep in a way that made Reggie's stomach flutter despite the way that the night had unfolded and started to question Reggie only to stop. Reggie knew it was because the other boy already knew why he was there._

_“I’m sorry,” Reggie said. It was the first thing he could think of, and it was true, too. He was sorry for being a burden, for running Luke's Christmas, for being too much, because he knew that he was. His thoughts started to spiral into ones like those until Luke's voice pulled him out of them._

_“Don't be,” Luke said, “Don’t be sorry, just come in.”_

_Reggie didn't say anything else, he just moved toward the window and let Luke help pull him and into his room. Once he was in they went about their normal routine: Luke got Reggie a pair of sweats to wear and sat on the bed while he changed. A lot of times they would leave the lamp on and talk, and sometimes they would even attempt to write together, but usually any song they wrote was too ridiculous or silly to ever legitimately work for the band. Tonight though, neither of them started a conversation._

_When Reggie finally went to sit next to Luke, his limbs were stiff and the silence was heavy. It felt different tonight, and it was clear that neither of them really knew what to say. Reggie felt movement beside him and looked over to see Luke reaching to his nightstand to turn off the lamp. When he turned back to face Reggie, their eyes met through the darkness and it was Luke's expression that finally broke him. His eyebrows knitted together in a look of both care and concern that made tears start to form in Reggie's eyes._

_“Reg, it's gonna be okay,” Luke said, finally breaking the silence, “I promise.”_

_“No, Luke,” Reggie said, the shakiness in his voice making Luke look even more in pain on behalf of his friend, “It's Christmas, and I should be with my family, but they can't even stop just for one minute to…”_

_Reggie trailed off, his quiet sobs leaving him unable to finish his sentence. Luke scooted closer to where his friend sat on the bed until their sides were pressed together. Reggie sunk into Luke at the contact and buried his face into his shoulder. Luke moved his arm to wrap around Reggie and rub soft circles on his back while he waited for his friend to calm down. And when Reggie's sobs were reduced to sniffles, Luke decided to speak up._

_“Hey,” Luke said, bringing his free hand up to Reggie's face and softly lifting his chin to try and get him to look at him. When Reggie raised his head and met Luke's eyes, the boy continued._

_“I’m your family, Reggie. And I know it's hard, buddy, to feel like you don't have your parents today. But me and Alex and Bobby, we're your family too. So you should be with me on Christmas,” Luke said. A few stray tears slipped from Reggie's eyes, and it was hard for Luke to keep from crying himself._

_“Thank you,” Reggie said after a moment, “I promise I'll be out before your parents wake up. I don't want to ruin your Christmas any more than I already have.”_

_“Just stay, Luke said, and Reggie looked at him, confused._

_“You haven't ruined anything,” he continued, “And you should just stay here and spend Christmas with me.”_

_“But, how would-” Reggie started, but was cut off by Luke’s lack of patience and excitement._

_“Come on, we could explain it to my parents and call yours if we need to,” Luke was very enthusiastic, clearly already formulating a plan in his head, “I just want you to be happy.”_

_Reggie didn't know what to say. He didn't know if it was really such a good idea, and he felt bad imposing on a Patterson family Christmas, but he also wasn't sure if Luke would even take no for an answer. After he thought about it for a minute, he nodded his head and Luke's simple grew bigger._

_“Good,” Luke said, “Now should we get some sleep?”_

_Reggie nodded again and moved off the bed so Luke could pull back the covers. They both climbed into the bed and situated themselves so they were facing each other. Soon after they laid down, Luke started softly humming the tune to “I’ll be Home for Christmas”, and Reggie's eyelids were heavy and he could feel himself already starting to drift off. Sometimes Luke would sing to him if he was having trouble falling asleep, but really he was just always able to sleep better when he was next to his friend no matter what. Reggie was almost asleep when he heard Luke stop humming to say something else:_

_“I love you, Reg,” he said, “So much. Don't ever forget that.”_

_A warmth settled over Reggie after hearing those words. They made his stomach flutter, even though he knew that Luke hadn't meant them in terms of anything more than friendship. But mostly, they made him feel cared for, and the contentment he felt was finally able to pull him into sleep. But not before he felt a pair of lips gently press against his forehead, giving him a lot to think about when he woke up in the morning. ___

__

__Reggie had never forgotten what Luke said that night about being his family. He opened his eyes in the morning with Luke’s head tucked into his chest and his arm, and even though he was still upset about his parents and slightly worried about what Luke's would say, it was the best way he could have woken up on Christmas. There was no shouting or knowing his parents' smiles were forced, just his best friend keeping him warm and safe._ _

__In the end, everything had worked out that day. Emily and Mitch were confused at first, and they made sure the boys knew they were all going to have a conversation about sleepovers on school nights and Reggie coming in through the front door from now on, but they let him stay and they were as welcoming as ever. They had all gotten up somewhat early, and Reggie got to spend the morning drinking hot chocolate watching Luke open his presents. There wasn't a lot of them because the Patterson's don't have a lot of money, but again, Reggie knew that's not what it was about for Luke. It was about his family being together and being grateful for that. So for the first time, he got to witness the so-called magic of Christmas. He believed in it now, and he never wanted it to stop._ _

__He had gone home after a late breakfast that morning and done all of the usual things with his parents, who hadn't even noticed he was gone. He wished he was still with his friend though, and that entire day he held onto the hope that they would spend a lot more Christmases together. Just the thought made him happy._ _

__By the time the next Christmas came around, Reggie had already made up his mind that he was going to spend it with Luke again. They were 17 and Sunset Curve was doing better than ever. But that also means that Luke's parents were harder on him too. They were pressing him about school and college, and trying to convince him that being in a band was a waste of time. It was early December when Luke finally ran away after one of the bigger fights with his mom. Reggie, Alex, and Bobby were trying to help him out in any way that they could, but Reggie knew that when Christmas really hit it was going to be even tougher for him._ _

__Reggie had thought about inviting Luke over to his house, but after spending last year at Luke’s house he didn't want to put him through the robotic, practiced routine that his family used to get through the holidays. Reggie ended up staying at the studio with him and having their own Christmas. He and Alex had gotten the cheapest tree they could find and helped Luke decorate the space to his heart's content. It seemed to lift his spirits at least a little bit and by the time Christmas eve rolled around he seemed to be in a pretty good mood. Alex could only stay for a little while that day since his family was more strict, but he promised to see both of them on the 26th. So it was just Luke and Reggie, but that was okay with the both of them. They got pizza and had hot chocolate and way too many cookies. They sang Christmas songs and had a good time, but Reggie couldn't ignore that there was still a sadness under the surface of Luke's cheery exterior. Reggie wasn't as good at the comfort stuff as Luke was, but he remembered that night that he had tried his best:_ _

__

_“Do you want to go for a walk?” Reggie asked when there was a lull in their conversation. It was just after 8 o’clock and it was pretty dark outside, but Reggie suggested it anyway because he thought it might be just what his friend needed._

_“Now?” Luke questioned, “Why?”_

_“I just thought some fresh air would be nice,” he said back, “Plus, you've run out of Christmas songs to play, and I’m not listening to any more Jingle Bells.”_

_The comment made Luke laugh, and soon the two of them had their jackets on and were stepping off of the studio into the night air. They started out on the beach, walking along the sand and talking about random things. Soon though, Reggie took a turn and started them towards some neighborhoods. Luke gave him a look, and Reggie was sure that his friend knew where they were going. He didn't say anything about it though, just went along, but their conversation had settled into a knowing yet comfortable silence as they neared their destination._

_When they finally turned on the Patterson's street, Reggie could see that the lights in Luke's house were still on. Reggie tried at some kind of physical comfort, putting his hand on Luke's back and squeezing his shoulder, but he knew that there wasn't much he could do to make this any less hard. The bassist stopped walking before they reached the driveway and his eyes met Luke's pained ones in a look of understanding._

_“I’ll be here,” Reggie said, giving him a sad smile, and Luke nodded and went ahead.  
Reggie tried to give him some privacy, turning away as he went to try and check on his parents without being seen. After a few minutes, he heard shoes scraping the pavement and turned to see Luke walking back his way. Reggie could see that he was crying, and as much as it broke his heart he knew that Luke wouldn't have been able to go through the holiday without at least making sure that his parents were okay. _

_As Luke neared Reggie held out his hand, and Luke paused for only a moment to take it before he kept on walking at a slower pace. Reggie stayed quiet for a moment as his friend wiped his eyes with his free hand. He didn't exactly know what to say, but he had to say something, so after a moment he spoke up._

_“Are you okay?” Reggie asked even though he already knew the answer. Luke shook his head just slightly before giving an honest answer._

_“I miss them so much,” Luke said, “But I was sick of having them treat my dreams like they didn't matter, and I couldn't keep pretending that music and the band wasn't such a big thing for me, that it wasn't what I wanted to do with my life.”_

_Luke's mention of pretending with his family caught his attention. What Luke had to do all year round was exactly what he did on Christmas. It wasn't quite the same, but maybe their situations were more alike than he thought._

_“I don't know,” Luke continued, “But I’m hoping that by next year they’ll come around.”_

_As they left the neighborhood, Luke gave Reggie's hand a squeeze before letting go. Reggie hoped that next year would be different too._

____ _ _

____But of course, there was no next year. Not for them, at least. Reggie was pulled back into the present moment and the realization that the Patterson's had 25 Christmases without their son, even if this was Luke's first one without even a hope of returning to them. Reggie finally pulled back from the hug, letting Luke get up to put his guitar away._ _ _ _

____Reggie needed to think of a way to make this a good year for his friend. Luckily he still had a couple weeks until the actual day, but he knew that he had to think of something that would help Luke get through their first Christmas as ghosts. The day was special to Luke, and the boy had always tried to make it special for his friends as well. Reggie never had a reason to believe in the spirit and love that was supposedly behind the holiday, that was, until Luke Patterson walked into his life and taught him that Christmas, among other things, isn't just about pretending. So Reggie had to make sure that it would be perfect for him this year, or at least as perfect as it could be, because of everything Luke had done for him in the past._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____It was finally Christmas Eve of the year 2020, and Reggie was pretty sure that Luke had started moping before they even got up for the day. He had halfheartedly tried to hide it, but there was no missing the way he looked longingly at the stockings hung up in Julie's living room, or how he visibly deflated when he realized he couldn't eat the cookies that smelled so good. After Reggie found Luke crying in the garage that day, the Christmas season picked up a little bit when Julie started introducing them to all the new pop culture aspects of Christmas. She watched Elf with them for the first time, and they had all absolutely loved it. They had done some fun things together over the past couple of weeks, but Reggie knew it was still going to be a hard day._ _ _ _

____Luke had told all of them that he didn't need to do anything special for Christmas, that it didn't need to be a big deal this year, but Reggie saw right through it. He had convinced Luke that they should decorate the studio altogether, and Julie had even gotten them a tree. And even though they couldn't do a lot of the same things they did when they were alive, the four of them were going to watch It’s a Wonderful Life altogether that night. It wasn't a lot but he knew that he wasn't going to be able to surprise Luke with anything big, so he was hoping that just being together was enough. Plus, Reggie had a present to give him in the morning that he thought was going to really make Luke feel in the Christmas spirit. And if Reggie might risk revealing some of his feelings for Luke, ones that went deeper than friendship, along with the gift then so be it._ _ _ _

____A lot had happened since they became ghosts, but one of the biggest things was that Reggie had finally let himself fully realize what it was he felt for Luke; he acknowledged that after all those nights he spent at Luke's and every time they shared a mic on stage that his feelings for Luke went beyond friendship and into romantic territory. It had really become obvious to him after Luke had tried to prove they had chemistry and done way too good of a job at it. Everything Reggie had bottled up for years came crashing over him in a gigantic wave of what he could only describe as, after some education from Julie, sheer bisexual panic._ _ _ _

____So Reggie was at a point where he couldn't deny the electricity he felt when he was next to the other boy, and truthfully he didn't even want to. They lost so much when they died: their chance at a normal future and career, their families, all the opportunities that they would have had--their lives were literally taken from them before they could really even begin. The hurt was too much if Reggie thought about it for too long, but the way he loved Luke gave him at least some semblance of hope for the future. They still had their music, but Reggie knew that it was just going to keep getting more complicated. The way he felt about Luke was the one thing he knew would never change, so Reggie didn't want to push that away. And besides, he had a feeling that Luke might actually feel the same way._ _ _ _

____But right now, that wasn't the top priority. First, he had to make sure that Luke made it through Christmas. At the moment the four of them were in the garage since Julie's family was taking a break in between activities and Alex hadn't planned to meet up with Willie until the following day. They were lazing around, listening to music, and putting up a few last-minute decorations when Luke cleared his throat and alerted everyone that he was going to go out for a while. Everyone knew exactly where he was going, but he poofed out before anyone could say anything about it._ _ _ _

____Reggie should have known that Luke would want to see his parents today, but he couldn't help but be surprised when his friend disappeared. The look on Luke's face just before he left was just short of agony, and Reggie didn't want to see him spiral into sadness any further. He had to do something, so he made a snap decision, and he could only hope that it was one that would help Luke._ _ _ _

____“I have to go too,” Reggie said, and Julie looked at him sadly and Alex nodded with a sort of understanding. He poofed out and after a second he reappeared on the front porch of the Patterson house where Luke was still standing as he prepared to go inside._ _ _ _

____“Reggie?” Luke looked confused, “What are you doing here? How did you know…” he trailed off, and Reggie knew that he wasn't upset at his presence, but he still had to explain what he was doing there._ _ _ _

____“I just-” Reggie started, struggling to find the right way to say what he wanted to._ _ _ _

____“You don't have to do this alone,” he said, but Luke still looked confused, “I just mean that I know today is hard for you, and I want you to know that you don't have to do it alone.”_ _ _ _

____“I'll go in with you, if you want,” Reggie continued, “I- I don't want you to be by yourself, so if you’ll let me…”_ _ _ _

____“Really?” Luke asked, and finally Reggie could see a glint of happiness on his face._ _ _ _

____“Yeah,” he said, “We always have each other, right?”_ _ _ _

____“Right,” Luke said, offering his friend a small smile. Luke took a deep breath and held out his hand for Reggie, who took it and twined their fingers together._ _ _ _

____“Ready?” Reggie asked, and Luke nodded before leading him through the door and into the house with their hands still joined._ _ _ _

____They ended up spending the entire afternoon there, and Reggie could see how hard it was for Luke. He could see how badly his friend wanted his parents to know he was there and how he struggled with the realization that they never really would. But at the same time, it seemed to provide him with some sort of closure. He would never have another family Christmas, or volunteer at the soup kitchen, or drink hot chocolate again, but to see his parents doing okay after all these years made him feel a little more okay, along with the fact that he knew he would always have his friends. It was a little less hopeless knowing that someone would always be by his side._ _ _ _

____They left eventually though, knowing Julie would have to go back to her family and not wanting to leave Alex by himself for too long. Before they did, though, Luke stopped to say one more thing to Reggie._ _ _ _

____“Thank you,'' Luke said, and Reggie knew he had made the right decision by coming with him, “It means a lot that you were here with me.”_ _ _ _

____“Of course,” he said, “I’d go anywhere for you.”_ _ _ _

____Usually Luke would reply to one of Reggie's cheesy lines like this with some sort of joke, but with emotions running high he simply smiled instead. Reggie could tell it was genuine, so it was a win in his book._ _ _ _

____They made it back to the studio and the rest of the night went okay. They all just hung out and watched movies, and Reggie noticed that Luke seemed to be doing okay. It was strange for all of them to be sending Christmas this way, but it ended up being okay-good, even. Just like Luke had told Reggie they were each other's family. They were all together, and that was all that mattered._ _ _ _

____When Christmas morning finally came, they all did their best to make the most of it, even if it wasn't perfect. Julie was expected to be with her dad and Carlos, but she had promised to come out and see them later. The three of them had been together for most of the morning, but eventually Alex went off to go see Willie, leaving Luke and Reggie to entertain themselves. Luckily though, the bassist had planned for just that. They were alone together in the studio, and Reggie figured it was as good a time as ever to give Luke his Christmas present, or at least something close to one that Reggie came up with._ _ _ _

____“Hey, can I show you something?” Reggie asked Luke where they were sitting on the couch._ _ _ _

____“Sure, Reg,” Luke said, focusing his attention on his friend, “What is it?”_ _ _ _

____Reggie had tried to write his own Christmas song, and even though, like most things these days, it wasn't perfect, he knew it was something he wanted to share with his friend anyway. And really, it hadn't even been very hard to figure out what to say. He had thought back to what Christmas had been like at his house, and what Luke made it feel, not just at the holidays but every time they were together. He took everything that he had learned about Christmas from watching Luke, all the love and the joy, and put it into verses that mostly rhymed. He just hoped that it was good enough to show Luke how he really felt, and maybe give him back a little piece of the Christmas magic he had lost._ _ _ _

____Reggie thought that maybe he should be nervous, but really he wasn't. It was just Luke, who he had sung for hundreds of times before. Reggie got up to get the acoustic guitar he had practiced with. Once he was sat back down across from Luke, he started strumming and poured his heart out in the song. He focused on playing and didn't share too many glances over at Luke, waiting until he was finished to see his reaction. By the time he played the last note and looked up from his instrument, Luke had a smile on his face and was staring at Reggie with affection._ _ _ _

____“Reggie, that was amazing,” Luke said, emotion undeniably in his voice, “You wrote that?”_ _ _ _

____“Yeah, Reggie said and then shrugged, “I did my best.”_ _ _ _

____“It was great,” Luke said, “really”_ _ _ _

____Luke was still smiling, but he also had a look that let Reggie know he was thinking about something. Luke looked like he was about to speak again, he was just gathering what he wanted to say, so Reggie stayed silent and hopeful as he put down the guitar and let it rest against the couch._ _ _ _

____“Reggie, what you did for me,” he started, still trying to find his words, “What you did for me yesterday, and then this song- you have no idea…”_ _ _ _

____Luke trailed off, shaking his head. When he looked over Reggie could see there were tears forming in his eyes. He was worried at first, that he had gone too far, but the way he was still smiling made him think that maybe they weren't bad tears._ _ _ _

____“You have no idea what it means to me,” he continued, “And I know that you're doing what any good friend would do, but uh,” Luke paused again, seemingly unsure of himself._ _ _ _

____“For me, it's more than that,” he said after a moment as he scooted closer to Reggie on the cough, “Reggie, the way we’ve always been with each other, and the way you’ve helped me it’s… I’m-”_ _ _ _

____Luke may have been an extremely talented songwriter, but in conversation, he sometimes struggled to say the right thing on the first try. But Reggie waited as patiently as he could, and eventually he got it together and said what he needed to:_ _ _ _

____“I love you, Reggie Peters,” Luke said, taking one of Reggie's hands in his, “I love you as more than just a friend, and I’m tired of pretending that I don't.”_ _ _ _

____“There so many things that I can't change or fix,” he continued, “But at least I can be honest about this.”_ _ _ _

____Reggie was so happy that he forgot that he needed to say something back at first, and he had left Luke anxiously awaiting his response._ _ _ _

____“Reg?” Luke asked, making Reggie finally realize that he had been stunned for too long and causing him to speak up._ _ _ _

____“Oh! Yeah I- I love you too, Luke,” Reggie said, “It goes without saying. I think I always have.”_ _ _ _

____Luke breathed a sigh of relief and his smile got even bigger, even though it didn't seem like it even could. And then he was letting go of Reggie's hands to cup his face, asking a question with his eyes. The darker haired boy nodded yes with a grin that disappeared as soon as Luke’s lips touched his for the first time._ _ _ _

____The kiss was amazing, and it made Reggie feel lighter than he ever had before; he felt like he was exactly where he was always meant to be. And if he didn't believe in the Christmas magic they talked about in movies before, he certainly did now._ _ _ _

____After they had pulled apart and then gone back in again at least several more times, and the guitar had been returned to its stand, they ended up cuddled together on the couch: Reggie sat with Luke's back pressed against his chest so he could soothingly run his fingers through the other's hair. Reggie thought back to all of the Christmases he had had throughout his life, and even though he wasn't technically alive anymore, he could still say that it was one of his best. He was content and he knew that Luke was too which was all he could ever ask for._ _ _ _

____In this moment, more than ever he could see the meaning of Christmas in a way that he hadn’t been able to with his own family. It was more than just watching Luke feel it too because he felt it himself now. The happiness that comes from just being together. And as he sat there with Luke on Christmas day, he hoped that feeling would never fade. He had no idea what the future would hold for them, but he knew that he would spend just like this for as long as he could, together with Luke and everyone else that he loved just as it should be._ _ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> Ughhhh I hope you guys like this!! I did my boy Alex and my girl Julie dirty in this by not including them very much and I feel like it might be a little out of character, but I just wanted to write something christmassy so I hope its good!


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